Story "2005 Days Of Game"

2005 days it was not loved just a cruel game fill his life with pain.
2 November 2017 After listening to these words, He was standing in front of the mirror and looking for himself he was trying to find out is there something remain which is alive. He feels self as a human machine, eyes, eyelids were frozen there was no moment. he put his hand on heart and try to feel if it's beating. Breath was coming and going but his face was just like a stone, he gives a tight slap to himself on the cheek but there were no tears in his eyes. they all were dried all was finish, no feelings no emotions everything was gone from the body but yet soul was there and he feels like his body became grave of his soul.
He sits on a chair and takes an envelope from the drawer. This is the letter he wrote for his beloved. after few days he is about to go to Army and he has doubt to return just 40% so he wrote a letter to his beloved, and wanted to give to his friend so in case of his death he can give to her. He opens the envelop and start read.
My Love, why you were cried? I’m here around you, now more than before because the soul is free from any boundaries, My love, I want to ask you one thing whenever you have a chance and whenever you can do, from me please give lots of thanks and regards to your parents, they think on that date they born their daughter but they do not know in a real manner they born my life,life of that person whom they never know yes but this is the truth they born my life when they born daughter, and how can I not be thankful to the beautiful couple who bring my life into this world?  and my love please forgive me, please forgive me that I got an order from god to stop my journey and everything stop for me and it's not in my hands to do Dishonor to his order, if you only know how much I want to stay and want to do all for making all our dreams come true if you only know how much it's difficult for me, without your embrace how it was difficult for my soul to leave my body and how much I wanted years and years life and life with you in your embrace which is always my real heaven. When angels told me, your time here is finished now you have to move to heaven, I replied to them, no. but you are talking me away from my heaven. But I just felt I close my eyes in your embrace because once you had told me I close you in my hug and for a second I not open my hug and never I'll not open my hug. So I was in your hug that time too.
My love what you always have mean to me I don't know how can I write and describe in words but the day when we fall in love with each other after that I can't imagine life inside my soul and happiness inside me without you, I knew that you love me so in that way. My love, please forgive for any of my mistakes whatever I have done in all that time. may possible sometimes I cause you pain but if it happens its happen by me unknowingly because I never even thought to cause you pain. Please forgive me if I have done any mistake. Sometimes we were crazy sometimes we done mistakes and hurt our relation and love but the most important thing is this in last we understood all and hold each other and keep alive our love and relation, my love whatever happened in our life we must take it as a lesson from life, lesson which we can teach to our children so they should not experience that and do not cause pain for themselves or for a loved one. I hope you will do and you must teach to our children the biggest mistake in life is the repeating of mistake and trust is the biggest gift which two beloveds can give to each other and honesty is the life of relation It will always keep your respect high in your loved one's eyes. my love we did not get chance to spend beside life but after all, this teaches us that love is not all about bodies and touch of bodies, love is all about to touch of souls and hearts deeply, love is all about to exchange feelings and emotions deeply, I may accept I failed to be a good person so I’m leaving this world and we did not get chance to be beside but I hope as a love as a partner of your soul I left some good memories some good things which will keep warm your heart and soul all the time I hope warmness of all that love and feelings which we used to shared will keep warm your heart, I knew it, behind me I have left nothing for you but that all my poems or my feelings which I shared with you in words will always stay for you and just for you forever and ever. I may know sometimes you didn't like when I used to ask for a sip of water and tea or anything something but I knew it in the world the all materialistic things destroyed one day but only the feelings and exchange of emotions and love stay forever and ever and it never destroys. You know my love? this was the biggest beauty of our love that we were far in distance but as we exchanged our feeling in such a way we always stayed very close and spent time as we are so much beside also. Sometimes we start lost it but after all, we didn't lose our love either each other value and this was the beauty of our love. I want so much that you shouldn't cry and don't miss me but whenever you want to feel me you can see or read that which all are dedicated to you from your madman, you know that in all that time I have caught many of our moments there are many photos and videos maybe near 400 or more just videos, after some time you will get that and then you can do with them how you think better. that day I had searched some health-related articles. these are the links please visit and read it will help to improve your health and immunity. .
My Love give my kisses and love to our tiger and princess doesn't matter if the never know about me, my love for them unconditional, I believe and I knew it they both are amazing and beautiful children and they will do all great in life and we will proud of them your love your care and your teachings will help them to shine like a star in the dark sky, I hope now I can ask for more better things for them from God. how much I remember that date 21-22 July when tiger sits in front of me and told me, papa, If you only know how that words yet Eco in my years. Princess face I remember so good and if you remember too when she was in your womb I saw her in my dream and next morning I told you I saw her and I explained you her face and about her and first time when I saw he it was not surprising for me that she is same as well as I saw her,she is cute she is naughty same as mom but if someone ask me I would like to say our mama is more naughty. Should I tell you, thank you so much, my love, for all that beautiful moments and such a beautiful gift in form of these 2 angels? but I afraid maybe I disrespect you because that is true the word thanks never be enough to grateful to you for all that great things which you brought into my life and for all that love and care which you gave to me for all that warm feelings and fragrance of your love which was scented my life and yet it's scenting my soul. How I can just tell you thanks for all that beautiful years which are the best time of my life which is the time in that I really lived life and felt happiness inside my soul. How I can just tell you thanks for the love you brought to me. but I want to tell and I wish if there is any life after this in every that new one I want you and just you as my love as my life as my wife. Now, I’m near to god I will request him so he blessed me by you again and again if there is any another life or if not then I will ask I will pray to him if I did anything good in my life and if you want to bless me then just bless me by my love after seeing all in the life, grand and grandchildren of children, when she will come here then give me chance so I can welcome her and give her to me so we can close each other in our hug for all the time which remain in-universe and never apart and spend in our hug all that time..but till then when tomorrow starts without me do not think we are apart for ever time you think of me just remember I’m right here in your heart.
"I will leave behind me, the crowd of memories of me
as a wealth of me, I will leave faithfulness of me
whenever you miss me, just stare at yourself in the mirror
in your beautiful eyes, I will leave a shadow of me"
Yours Forever
And my love if I tell you truth I have regret I didn't get a chance to read Poem which I wrote for the princess, but what difference I read or you read this my last poem to her.
Daughter One word but for us it's our entire world day and night we used to create your image in our dream's world and we are in love with you from the time when you didn't exist in the world the happiest moment of life, when you came I remember the day when we gave you name I heard the word Blessing of God realized, what it is at that time when you were sent to us by God he created you in his special way Puffy cheeks, cute small hands, the cutest thing it's your little anger on your sweet Nose and the miracle is, your so innocent eyes but if you know, you are so naughty when with the brother you fight your forehead where God has written all our happiness you are the light in our darkness Your smile is a perfect medicine on wounds Which gives deep relax to heart without a sound Your voice is the best music which echoes in our home in form of a daughter you are the shadow of God in our home We are fortunate we have you the twinkle in our eyes it's you Someday if you ask me what is the meaning of happiness for you I will say just one line O Daughter, what happiness mean to me it's just you, My Happiness it just begins and ends with you. it just begins and ends with you.
He finished to read this letter and tear out this letter, within a few seconds letter turn in to small pieces now there is no need of this letter he understood very well no one is going to cry for him, no one was in love with him all that time it was just a game, he had no place in her life and that already replaced by someone another even without empty. He just took another paper and wrote Just one line "God Bless you, Keep Smile"
The weather was fantastic it was beautiful summer, in their house garden they all were playing and enjoying, she was looking so happy, she was running here and there to catch children because they are really naughty. Then she catches daughter and sits on the chair just a few steps ahead he was standing and he has a lovely smile on his face. but they can not see him because souls are not visible to the human. An angel came near to him and asked him
Angel:-"are you smiling?" He looks at the angel and replied
He:- "yes" angel was looking at him as something do not understand. So the angel asked him again
Angel:- "But she never loves you, do you remember what she told you ? in the starting of your relationship you told her one lie about your Heart Problem and she gets pain so she was with you only to fill pain your life.
He:- he looks at the angel, he walks little toward a flower and said "after my death when I came here and look here that angels too do many mistakes, but as soon as know they done mistake they accept it. This is the difference between an angel and Human. we humans do not want to accept our mistake, we need something so we can put all blame on that and proof that we are right, nothing wrong, She even does not remember I didn't tell her about the heart problem, I told her about my migraine pain, and not in the starting of our relationship but in the starting of our friendship just 7 days we had met and I needed to go to the clinic for my brain migraine treatment and I told I will go throw operation but yes it was not operation and when I understand I love her before I told her about love I told her all that true and I told her I am married but there are many problems, i hide you before because as a just friend you no need to know it but now I understood I love you so you must know all the truth about me before I told you I love you and I wait for your answer. if you feel the same feelings for me."
Angel:- " Angel walk toward him and said " so what happens? it's good before proposing you open all truth about you but she had told lie too she had introduced her self as a single mother whose husband is a drinker and beat her and she told you soon she wants the divorce, she told lie too
He:- " that time if she told me that truth which she told at the last after 2005 days, that in our life all is great and for all people, we are a great couple. if I knew it I nerve to open my feelings on her. I can keep hiding my love but not open it on her to destroy a happy family. yes I had doubt about it that all good in her family that's why I always hesitate to take a big step because of I afraid to destroy or create the problem in a happy family" He stops his some words in his mouth angel was looking right on his face and told him
Angel - " You was afraid to destroy her family but she especially destroyed your life, let me remind you what she told you She said all that years you give me nothing only poems and so on " He cut angel's words and said
He:- yes this is true, all that years I gave her nothing, no any expansive gifts, no money, just poems and so on because I had no money and in the totally new place I have lots of problems I was fighting for work, but yes i am failed situations and conditions are no matter for people only matter your victory or defeat " as he stopped at the same time right there angel asked him
Angel:- "and what she gave to you? ".
There was a silent for a second then angel post the next question without the wait for his reply.
Angel - did you met and used her sex
He:- he was looking at an angel's face and said " No " there was a silent for a second and he said
"answering of your first question, no matter what you got in love but you remembered only for what you gave and I didn't give anything to her"
Angel:- But she betrayed you so many times, she replaced with another man, she was continued to flirt with another man, she kept many knives in your back when she was pregnant her old boyfriend came back to her she was playing with him also, don't mind but a woman with 3 men in one time, one by whom she pregnant 2nd you to whom she always said I love you, you are love of my life and 3rd her old boyfriend after that you trusted on her? even she had broken her son's swear which she took, do you think a woman who does not think about her own child she will ever think about you and your pain? if a woman can not care for her own child she will be careful of your feelings? for what you trusted.?
He:- when you love someone you want to give chance to them to correct their mistakes when you put someone near to your God you believe you trust them much more, even more than what you see you trust on their words.
about my pain and all it doesn't matter she never loved me so why she needed to think about my pain and about my life, I was no one for her she was with me just to gave me pain.but I always have regret she used her own son also, how she forgot it's her own child who she kept 9 months in the womb, I have regret, for her game, she used her own an innocent child by his lie swear
Angel:- what exactly happened that day?
He:- I caught her doing flirting with another man, a man about whom she already had done promise to me that she will not be in contact with him anymore and when I come to know I told her now its enough, you can live how you want it's your life but I can't see any more you, she called to so many times then finally i received call , she told me if you decided this then ok, but only last time I want to see you, we met, her son was in her lep her lips were on his head and she said "I swear by my son, it was the last time, now I will never betray you, I will never cheat you, please forgive me last time, I swear by my son I'm yours and will be only yours" but by the time later, I came to know it was just lie swear just to keep hold of me so she can play the cruel game, as she said in her last message, That's it.
Angel:- maybe you will not like to listen but she never changed, she like flirt with other men doesn't matter for her husband children respect, she doesn't think about children too all she think its only about her flirt, yes she never loved you
He:- what to blame anyone? everyone living their life as they think it's right, who we are to judge? didn't love, didn't love, you can't force anyone to love you
Angel - when she pregnant by her husband. That time too you don't understand that she doesn't love you and doesn't see future with you because if she loves you then she doesn't want to make a plan for a child with a person with whom she doesn't want live
He:- he takes a deep breath and said "thought. I thought that but she said it's happened under situation and now already late, she said, but I want to be with you because I love you not to my husband but I only afraid you will not love this child .and I trust on her words and promise her that for this child to there will be no lack of love in my love. Happened what happened, doesn't matter anything just matter this is part of you if I love everything belongs to you so how I'll not love this child. she born daughter and princess nickname its I gave to her.
Angel:- " she told you that because she wanted to destroy your life. well let me remind you what she told you more, I gave one serious swear for self that I will do all that you will love me so crazy and I will give you all pain in million times more then you gave me the first time. And I did that. Yes, we are stranger and never were together it was my cruel plan for doing it with you. Now, game over I took all that I wanted 6 years ago. I hated you all that time but for taking my result I keep a mask on me. Now I am happy totally. and yes about the child we plan princess and we both wanted a child so much. in our life all is great and for all people, we are a great couple. Bye, and you took all the pain what I wanted to give you. Bye looser and I am glad that you didn't understand my plan till the end"
angel finish his words like reading a letter and look at him, it was quite silent in the air, then again angel break his silence "After this, you smile too see her happy? after that you feel good that she is happy? "
He looks direct at angel's face and gives a big smile, yes his eyes were wet but a big smile was roses on his face and he said
He:- " if I start to hate her just because she betrayed me then I will betray my love. Happiness what we achieved after losing to our loved one, that is not possible to achieve even after winning the whole world, each day, every morning what I pray to god ? each night before close eyes what I pray to god ? in the each of my prays what it was? only, only this that she live happy she get all happiness and her life blossom like a rose. more than her happiness what I have asked? nothing. only her happiness and what she told? Now I am happy totally. And I am glad. so I achieved what I wanted and she was wrong, I am not looser, looser is that person who wanted to achieve something but does not achieve, I always wanted to achieve that she lives happily and she is happy so I'm the winner. I won in that what I wanted. She hates me but after that too I became the reason for her happiness and make her totally happy so I'm not looser in last I'm the winner".
he replied and smile a little more while giving her a look where she was playing with her daughter. Angel was looking to him by little shock, then he said
Angel:- "But she filled so much pain in your life, she gave you lots of pain and you died in that pain. She destroyed your whole life, you can also give her pain. You could reply her in the same way as she did "
he takes a pose, silence pose which spoke more than words, then he replied
He:- " yes, it is right, if I wanted I could fill pain in her life too, yes it is true if I wanted I can destroy all things in her life and if I wanted I could do all that she can suffer in pain more then me. but if I did so then What the difference between her and my love? then what the difference that I was with her for love and she was with me to give pain? I did as my nature as my parents and life taught me and she did as her nature and as her parents taught her.
Angel:- Angel was trying to convince him so he raises argument”
but nothing wrong, she played with you, you can play with her too she doesn't love then why you think about her and her family? "
He listens to the angel and replied to him
He:- “Rule regulation. tram and conditions these are the part of the business, I give you something you give me something in return this is the business. Love is not business love is a feeling unconditional when we fall in love with someone there is no condition that person should fall in love with us. doesn't matter what she gave to me, the matter is what I gave and what honesty I have in my love. doesn't matter what she was doing, matter what I was doing. she is answerable to self to self-soul and to self-God and I'm answerable to myself and to my God. we should not take God's job in our hands, its God's job to give punishment or to reward by deeds of the person. when a person betrayed someone first that person betrayed to themselves who speak somewhere inside that they are a good person. maybe I could betray her but how can I betray myself? if I start jealous with her happiness just because she is happy with someone another and snatch and throw my smile then I could betray to my love. if I start to hate her just because I come to know that she hated me, so it means I betray my love. Should I betray my love?"
angel was looking at him and his reaction was telling like he is going to lose this debate and with smile angel said
Angel:- " And is it the love ?"
He - "Yes this is the love"
Angel:- directly angel asked one more question "will you advise someone to love like this as you did or as you do? he asked and look from his face to her face
He:- he looks at the angel and for while keeping silent, then he said " No. because it brings the pain. And every person must do the search for happiness. forget what happens in yesterday and find out new happiness. but my advise to everyone be honest with self and with others also"
he replied and his neck turn toward her to see her smiling face.
Angel give him a smile and without saying anything angel starts to move towards heaven but as he walks some steps he turns neck and gives him a warning " till 5 o clock you must return otherwise God will Throw you in Hell " he was listing angel voice but his eyes stayed just on her face, he was staring at her with his soft eyes and he whispered
" So long ago My God Throw me in the Hell"
Disclose :- This is a fiction story, This story is totally based on writer's imaginations, it has nothing to do with any person or situation if its so then it is just a coincident, without permission or N.O.C of writer any kind of use of this story will be considered as copyright violation, readers may share on social sites but its request you to use all copyright details also.
copyright © 2017 Mohammed zaki Ansari
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Mohammed Zaki Ansari -07/11/2017